Still Life

“I stand on the edge of a cliff in my own bedroom.” Gillian Marchenko continues her description of depression: “I must keep still. Otherwise I will plunge to my death. ‘Please God, take this away,’ I pray when I can.” For Gillian, “dealing with depression” means learning to accept and treat it as a physical illness. In these pages she describes her journey through various therapies and medications to find a way to live with depression. She faces down the guilt of a wife and mother of four, two with special needs. How can she care for her family when she can’t even get out of bed? Her story is real and raw, not one of quick fixes. But hope remains as she discovers that living with depression is still life.


Gillian Marchenko is the author of the memoirs Still Life, A Memoir of Living Fully with Depression, and Sun Shine Down, a book about her third child’s birth and diagnosis of Down syndrome while living in Kyiv, Ukraine. Gillian is a national speaker and advocate for individuals with mental illness and special needs. She has written for many publications including Literary MamaChicago ParentThriving Family, and Today’s Christian Woman. Gillian and her husband Sergei live with their four daughters near St. Louis, Missouri. Catch up with her on Facebook and Twitter.